sad
October 23, 2007Until this moment, I never understood how hard it was to lose something you never had.. 
saying goodbye…
If saying goodbye hurts so much, why do we say goodbye? Because it hurts so much more to keep holding on to something that isn't there. Like you're hanging off a ledge and someone is jumping up and down on your hands but you still can't let go. Like when you're little and you're being tickled…you shout for it to stop because it's torture, but then you go back for more, because somehow being tickled makes you feel safe and special. Holding on is like that…but the torture is painful…and it doesn't make you smile. That's why we're supposed to say goodbye. That's why we're meant to let go…
someone’s always saying goodbye…
Why do people fall in love
and they end up crying
Why do lovers walk away from themselves
When their hearts are breaking
Why does loving sometimes never stay long
Why does kissing this time
mean you’ll be gone
Why does gladness become sadness
Things that I don’t get
Someone’s always saying goodbye
I believe it hurts when we cry
Don’t we know partings never so easy
and with all the achings inside
I believe some hearts won’t survive
Trying hard to pretend
that we’re gonna be fine
I could never really love
someone else but you
I have never wanted anything else
but a love so true
But just like a dream
that comes in the night
In the morning you were out of my sight
Turned away from me
Sadly as I see
Away from where I stand
Why people fall in love?
October 22, 2007It is a mystery why we fall in love. It is a mystery how it
happens. It is a mystery when it comes. It is a mystery why
some love grows and it is a mystery why some love fails.
You can analyze this mystery and look for reasons and
causes, but you will never do anymore that take the life out
of the experience. Just as life itself is more than the sum of
the bones and muscles and electrical impulses in the body,
love is more than the sum of the interests and attractions
and commonalities that two people share. And just as life
itself is a gift that comes and goes in its own time, so too, the
coming of love must be taken as an unfathomable gift that
cannot be questioned in its ways.
Sometimes, hopefully at least once in your life - the gift of
love will come to you in full flower. Take hold of it and
celebrate it in all inexpressible beauty. This is the dream we
all share. More often, it will come and take hold of you,
celebrate you for a brief moment, then move on.
When this happen to young people, they too often try to
grasp the love and hold it to them, refusing to see that it is a
gift that just as freely, moves away. When they fall out of
love, or the person they love feels the spirit of love leaving,
they try desperately to reclaim the love that is lost rather
than accepting the gift for what it was, then moving on.
They want answers where there are no answers. They
want to know what is wrong in them that makes the other
person no longer love them, or try to get their love to change,
thinking that if some small things were different, love would
bloom again. They blame their circumstances and say that if
they go far away and start a new life, their love will grow.
They try anything to give meaning to what has happened. But
there is no meaning beyond the love itself, and until they
accept its own mysterious ways, they live in a sea of misery.
You need to know this about love, and accept it. You need to
treat what it brings you with kindness. If you find yourself in
love with someone who does not love you, be gentle with
yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. Love just didn't
choose to rest in the other person's heart.
If you find yourself someone in love with you but you don't
love him back, feel honored that love came and called at your
door, but gently refuse the gift you cannot return. Do not
take advantage; do not cause pain. How you deal with love
is how you deal with yourself. All our hearts feel the same
pains and joys, even if our lives and ways are different.
If you fall in love with another, and he falls in love with you,
and then love chooses to leave, do not try to reclaim it nor to
assess blame. Let it go. There is a reason and there is a
meaning. You will know in time.
Remember that you don't choose love. Love chooses you. All
you can really do is accept it for all its mystery when it
comes into your life. Feel the way it fills you to overflowing,
then reach out and give it away. Give it back to the person
who brought it alive in you. Give it to others who deem it
poor in spirit. Give it to the world around you in any way you can.
There is where many lovers go wrong. Having been so long
without love, they understand love only as a need. They see
their hearts as empty places that will be filled by love, and
they begin to look at love as something that flows to them
rather than from them.
The first blush of new love is filled to overflowing, but as
their love cools, they revert to seeing their love as a need.
They cease to be someone who generates love and instead
become someone who seeks love. They forget that the
secret of love is that it is a gift, and that it can be made to
grow only by giving it away.
Remember this and keep it to your heart. Love has its time, its
own season, its own reason for coming and going. You
cannot bribe it or coerce it, or reason it into staying. You can
only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it
comes to you. But if it chooses to leave from your heart or
from the heart of your lover, there is nothing you can do and
there is nothing you should do. Love always has been and
always will be a mystery. BE GLAD THAT IT CAME TO LIVE
FOR A MOMENT IN YOUR LIFE.
If you keep you heart open, it will come again…
like…love…faults…
When you like someone, you like them inspite of their faults.
When you love someone, you love them with their faults.
no reason!
It doesn't take a reason to love someone,
but it does to like someone. You don't love
someone because you want to, you love someone
because you are destined too. It's because you
fall in Love with them, that you then try to
find a reason, but you always come up with
the answer, No reason!
The 5.75 Questions You’ve Been Avoiding
October 20, 2007You can’t escape from the big questions.
Your life is woven from the answers you’ve given.
The answers that you’re living.
These are the questions at whose heart lies… Courage, adventure, Happiness.
They shift the sand, spark the flame, smash the myths.
See where the questions take you. Open up possibilities in your life.
- What’s going well for you?
The good things in your life hide as…ordinary…expected…unremarkable.
So celebrate what’s working now.
Bring them out and hold them up to the light.
Savour this.
Notice what’s sweet.
- What are you trying to ignore?
Pain relief?
Anxiety is the on the shoulder that says: “Hey, Something important is happening here”.
Vacation.
Stop looking the other way.
You’re on the edge of something that matters.
Pay Attention.
- What’s boring you?
Ho humm. You know things have got a little too comfortable.
And comfortable is just BOREDOM…with P.R.
Something’s going stale.
Stir things up.
Parachuting confidential.
Great Leaders. Great Writers.
- How do you want to be remembered?
You’ve already signed up for something.
Said to the world “Yes this is me”.
You’re on the journey. The tunnels of England.
Your epitaph is already half-written.
Decide how it ends.
- Who do you love?
People.
You have connections forward, and back here and elsewhere.
When you think about them, you smile.
They’ve left their fingerprints
Love them and be loved.
¾. So what’s next?
New possibilities have opened up.
Something’s shifted.
Make the change
Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart.
Try to love the questions themselves…
At present you need to live the question.
Perhaps you will gradually even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer.
human memory
October 10, 2007Scientists do not yet understand many things about human memory and many of
the ideas and theories about it are still quite controvercial. The following
discussion emphasizes some of the more widely agreed upon ideas. For
instance, most scientists agree that it is very useful to describe human
memory as a set of STORES which are "places" to put information, plus a set of
PROCESSES that that act on the stores.
A very simple model might contain 3 different stores:
The Sensory Information Store (SIS)
The Short-Term Store (STS)
The Long-Term Store (LTS)
… and 3 processes
Encoding (putting information into a store)
Maintenance (keeping it "alive")
Retrieval (finding encoded information)
A theory of human memory should not only identify a set of processes and
stores, but also be able to help answer questions such how long it will take
to retrieve accessible information and when information will be forgotten
(become inaccessible). To do this, the theory must specify properties of the
processes and stores. For example, a store might have a "maximum capacity"
— in other words, a maximum quantity of information that it can hold at a
given time. If we know a store's capacity and what happens when that capacity
is exceeded, we will be able to predict that certain information will be
forgotten at certain times.
In the relatively simple model of memory presented here, sensory information
(from eyes, ears, etc..) enters the Sensory Information Store (SIS) and is
either ignored or paid attention to. Ignored information doesn't last very
long. New perceptual information quickly writes over (masks) the old, a
process sometimes described as "interference." Attended information is not
only protected from interference, it is processed by higher-level mechanisms
that figure out what it means. For instance, information in the SIS might
indicate a bright red object somewhere ahead. Attending to this information
might reveal that there it is a stop-sign. Once information is processed in
this way, it can be encoded into the short-term store (STS).
Usually, the STS is described as having a limited storage capacity (seven,
plus or minus two items) that "decay" and become inaccessible after a
relatively brief interval (estimates range from 12 to 30 seconds). In
addition to decay, loss of information from the STS can occur by interference
when new information displaces older information. Interference does not
always cause information to be lost, but may instead produce memory retrieval
errors in which one recalls information that is similar to but not identical
with that which is needed.
Information can be maintained in STM for releatively lon periods using
maintenance rehearsal (MR), a term describing the act of mentally (subvocally)
repeating the information to be maintained. In many cases, the reason one
wishes to maintain information in the STS is to allow time for it to be
encoded into the long-term store (LTS), and thus become more permanently
available. However, maintenance rehearsal does not appear to be very
efficient way to get the memory into long-term memory. Another memory
maintenance technique, elaboration rehearsal (ER) seems to work better.
Long-term memory can store a very large quantity of information and can
maintain that information for very long periods of time. It holds many
different kinds of information including: facts, events, motor and perceptual
skills, knowledge of physical laws, spatial models of familiar environments,
attitudes and belifs about ourselves and others, etc. Many different factors
seem to affect the difficulty of accessing a memory in the LTS. These factors
include: the similarity between current conditions and those that existed when
the memory was stored, how recently the memory was last used, its degree of
inter-relatedness to other knowledge, its uniqueness relative to other LTS
information, and so on. Much scientific research remains to be done to
specify the effects of these factors in detail and to determine the mechanisms
by which they produce their effects.
This graphic might help you visualize what you've learned:
goldfish memory
What is the span of goldfish memory. Do they even have the capacity to remember? These are the questions that this article will endeavor to answer, as well as giving you some great information on goldfish in general.
Well do goldfish have a memory? After extensive research, scientists were able to conclude that the goldfish memory last around 3 seconds, depending on the breed. You may find this amazing and also disturbing at the same time! This that every time your goldfish looks at you, it isn't able to recognize you, therefore there is no possibility of creating a close relationship with your goldfish.
Also there is another thing that goldfish owners should take into consideration and that is the fact that goldfish are going to be constantly seeing and re-recognizing the same features in and around your tank or aquarium. If you never change the look of your tank, than this can be detrimental to the live of your fish. You have to remember that they are living creatures and one thing that all living creatures have in common, is that they need constant stimulation to stay alive.
If your fish never has the opportunity to see something new every so often, they're brains will never grow, this is because they are only being stimulated by the same images, time after time. Do your fish a favor and change your tank around as often as possible. The goldfish memory is weak, however you must remember that the brain has other functions also and they have to be stimulated in order for it to keep running.
Can you increase goldfish memory?
Well like any other part of the brain, it has the potential to improve as well as diminish. Different breeds have different time spans of memory, however the average goldfish usually has a memory of around 3 seconds as previously stated. They will never have the capacity to remember things for a great deal of time, however even the slightest memory change will increase their lifespan dramatically.
One of the best ways to do this is by changing the look and feel of your tank consistently. Colors are one of the easiest recognized things from a goldfish memory point of view. Therefore it's advised to add in bright colors and to change them as often as possible. Just by making these small changes, you will notice a difference in the energy levels of your goldfish and they will generally live for a lot longer than usual.
a guide to wasting time at work
October 9, 2007According to a survey on Salary.com, employees admit to “wasting” approximately 2.09 hours of each work day. How do they waste the time? Surfing the Net, chatting with co-workers, making personal phone calls, and running personal errands.
Here’s how the time wasting break down:
- Surfing the Internet — 44.7 percent
- Socializing with co-workers — 23.4 percent
- Conducting personal business — 6.8 percent [I’m not sure if this means calling your hairstylist to schedule an appointment or running a dry-cleaning business out of your cube.]
- Spacing out — 3.9 percent [How, exactly, would you measure that?]
- Running errands off-premise — 3.1 percent
- Making personal phone calls — 2.3 percent
- Applying for other jobs — 1.3 percent
- Planning personal events — 1.0 percent
- Arriving late/leaving early — 1.0 percent
- Other — 12.5 percent [Other? What’s left, dare I ask?]
Also according to the survey, the way in which time is wasted also varies by age:
- 58-77 years old: 0.50 hours per day
- 48-57 years old: 0.68 hours per day
- 38-47 years old: 1.19 hours per day
- 28-37 years old: 1.61 hours per day
- 22-27 years old: 1.95 hours per day
(Wonder how much time is “wasted” in meetings or poor communication between departments?) Do you think these numbers are about right? How do you “waste” time?
Misconceptions on the road to happiness
October 3, 2007Misconception #1: "Once I know the tools for being happy, then it will work like magic."
Don't expect the results to come automatically. It is possible to intellectually understand how to attain happiness, yet not put it into practice. In fact, many people might actually prefer to be comfortable and unhappy, rather than endure the discomfort of changing their habits. Just as learning any new skill requires effort, you have to be willing to invest serious effort to achieve real happiness.
Misconception #2: "If I become content and satisfied with what I have, I'll lose my motivation to achieve more."
Happiness doesn't drain your energy. It adds more! Ask a happy person: "I have a boat. Do you want to go fishing?" He'll say: "Great! Let's go!" Now ask someone who is depressed: "C'mon, let's go fishing!" He says, "I'm tired. Maybe tomorrow. And anyway, it might rain…" Happy people are energetic and ambitious. There's never enough time to do everything they want to do.
Misconception #3: Happiness is optional. If I want to be depressed, that's my own prerogative
A beautiful Sunday afternoon. You're at the park having a picnic with your friends. Suddenly the air is pierced by one person complaining: "Who forgot the forks? It's too hot for volleyball. I want to go home already." You have an obligation to be happy when your mood is negatively affecting others. Don't spoil the fun. We all try to put on a happy face when we're at a party. But what about when we are at home, with our kids? Or when we trudge into the office on Monday morning? Like an open pit in the middle of the road, a sour puss is a public menace. Being happy is part of being considerate to the people around us.
huh???
October 1, 2007"I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure if you realize that what you heard is not what I meant."
