if

If I knew missing you was going to be a part of my life,
I never would have let you in.

why?

Why am I afraid to lose you when you're not even mine…

learn to live without them…

You never really stop loving someone.
You just learn to try to live without them.

yeah right…

You're not worth the tears,
you're not worth the heartache.
I don't know why I give you the time.
You're not worth the pain,
you're not worth the emptiness.
I don't know why I wish you were mine.

road to success…

The road to success is always under construction.

It is a progressive course, not an end to be reached…

wish…

I must be wishing on someone else's star
because someone else always gets what I wished for.

52 Proven Stress Reducers

1.     Get up fifteen minutes earlier in the morning. The inevitable morning mishaps will be less stressful.

2.     Prepare for the morning the evening before. Set the breakfast table, make lunches, put out the clothes you plan to wear, etc.

3.     Don’t rely on your memory. Write down appointment times, when to pick up the laundry, when library books are due, etc. ("The palest ink is better than the most retentive memory." - Old Chinese Proverb)

4.     Do nothing which, after being done, leads you to tell a lie.

5.     Make duplicates of all keys. Bury a house key in a secret spot in the garden and carry a duplicate car key in your wallet, apart from your key ring.

6.     Practice preventive maintenance. Your car, appliances, home, and relationships will be less likely to break down/fall apart "at the worst possible moment."

7.     Be prepared to wait. A paperback can make a wait in a post office line almost pleasant.

8.     Procrastination is stressful. Whatever you want to do tomorrow, do today; whatever you want to do today, do it now.

9.     Plan ahead. Don’t let the gas tank get below one-quarter full; keep a well-stocked "emergency shelf" of home staples; don’t wait until you’re down to your last bus token or postage stamp to buy more; etc.

10.   Don’t put up with something that doesn’t work right. If your alarm clock, wallet, shoe laces, windshield wipers ‘ whatever ‘ are a constant aggravation, get them fixed or get new ones.

11.   Allow 15 minutes of extra time to get to appointments. Plan to arrive at an airport one hour before domestic departures.

12.   Eliminate (or restrict) the amount of caffeine in your diet.

13.   Always set up contingency plans, "just in case." ("If for some reason either of us is delayed, here’s what we’ll do’" kind of thing. Or, "If we get split up in the shopping center, here’s where we’ll meet.")

14.   Relax your standards. The world will not end if the grass doesn’t get mowed this weekend.

15.   Pollyanna-Power! For every one thing that goes wrong, there are probably 10 or 50 or 100 blessings. Count ‘em!

16.   Ask questions. Taking a few moments to repeat back directions, what someone expects of you, etc., can save hours. (The old "the hurrieder I go, the behinder I get, " idea.)

17.   Say "No!" Saying "no" to extra projects, social activities, and invitations you know you don’t have the time or energy for takes practice, self-respect, and a belief that everyone, everyday, needs quiet time to relax and be alone.

18.   Unplug your phone. Want to take a long bath, meditate, sleep, or read without interruption’ Drum up the courage to temporarily disconnect. (The possibility of there being a terrible emergency in the next hour or so is almost nil.) Or use an answering machine.

19.   Turn "needs" into preferences. Our basic physical needs translate into food, water, and keeping warm. Everything else is a preference. Don’t get attached to preferences.

20.   Simplify, simplify, simplify

21.   Make friends with nonworriers. Nothing can get you into the habit of worrying faster than associating with chronic worrywarts.

22.   Get up and stretch periodically if your job requires that you sit for extended periods.

23.   Wear earplugs. If you need to find quiet at home, pop in some earplugs.

24.   Get enough sleep. If necessary, use an alarm clock to remind you to go to bed.

25.   Create order out of chaos. Organize your home and workspace so that you always know exactly where things are. Put things away where they belong and you won’t have to go through the stress of losing things.  

26.   When feeling stressed, most people tend to breathe in short, shallow breaths. When you breathe like this, stale air is not expelled, oxidation of the tissues is incomplete, and muscle tension frequently results. Check your breathing throughout the day, and before, during, and after high-pressure situations. If you find your stomach muscles are knotted and your breathing is shallow, relax all your muscles and take several deep, slow breaths. Note how, when you’re relaxed, both your abdomen and chest expand when you breathe.

27.   Writing your thoughts and feelings down (in a journal, or on paper to be thrown away) can help you clarify things and can give you a renewed perspective.

28.   Try the following yoga technique whenever you feel the need to relax. Inhale deeply through you nose to the count of eight. Then, with lips puckered, exhale very slowly through your mouth to the count of 16, or for as long as you can. Concentrate on the long sighing sound and feel the tension dissolve. Repeat 10 times.

29.   Inoculate yourself against a feared event. Example: before speaking in public, take time to go over every part of the experience in your mind. Imagine what you’ll wear, what the audience will look like, how you will present your talk, what the questions will be and how you will answer them, etc. Visualize the experience the way you would have it be. You’ll likely find that when the time comes to make the actual presentation, it will be "old hat" and much of your anxiety will have fled.

30.   When the stress of having to get a job done gets in the way of getting the job done, diversion ‘ a voluntary change in activity and/or environment ‘ may be just what you need.

31.   Talk it out. Discussing your problems with a trusted friend can help clear your mind of confusion so you can concentrate on problem solving.

32.   One of the most obvious ways to avoid unnecessary stress is to select an environment (work, home, leisure) which is in line with your personal needs and desires. If you hate desk jobs, don’t accept a job which requires that you sit at a desk all day. If you hate to talk politics, don’t associate with people who love to talk politics, etc.

33.   Learn to live one day at a time.

34.   Every day, do something you really enjoy.

35.   Add an ounce of love to everything you do.

36.   Take a hot bath or shower (or a cool one in summertime) to relieve tension.

37.   Do something for somebody else.

38.   Focus on understanding rather than on being understood; on loving rather than on being loved.

39.   Do something that will improve your appearance. Looking better can help you feel better.

40.   Schedule a realistic day. Avoid the tendency to schedule back-to-back appointments; allow time between appointments for a breathing spell.

41.   Become more flexible. Some things are worth not doing perfectly and some issues are well to compromise upon.

42.   Eliminate destructive self-talk: "I’m too old to’," "I’m too fat to’," etc.

43.   Use your weekend time for a change of pace. If you work week is slow and patterned, make sure there is action and time for spontaneity built into your weekends. If your work week is fast-paced and full of people and deadlines, seek peace and solitude during your days off. Feel as if you aren’t accomplishing anything at work’ Tackle a job on the weekend which you can finish to your satisfaction.

44.   "Worry about the pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves." That’s another way of saying: take care of the todays as best you can and the yesterdays and the tomorrows will take care of themselves.

45.   Do one thing at a time. When you are with someone, be with that person and with no one or nothing else. When you are busy with a project, concentrate on doing that project and forget about everything else you have to do.

46.   Allow yourself time ‘ everyday ‘ for privacy, quiet, and introspection.

47.   If an especially unpleasant task faces you, do it early in the day and get it over with; then the rest of your day will be free of anxiety.

48.   Learn to delegate responsibility to capable others.

49.   Don’t forget to take a lunch break. Try to get away from your desk or work area in body and mind, even if it’s just for 15 or 20 minutes.

50.   Forget about counting to 10. Count to 1,000 before doing something or saying anything that could make matters worse. 51.   Have a forgiving view of events and people. Accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world.

52.   Have an optimistic view of the world. Believe that most people are doing the best they can.

the wonder of forgiving…

* Forgiveness means bending without breaking, being strong enough to withstand the heavy weight of injury but resilient enough to recover. Be forgiving. * Forgive yourself; for what you regret doing and for what you wish you had done, for not being fully yourself and for being only yourself. * Self-forgiveness cleanses the soul, washing away shame and guilt. Out of self-forgiveness comes the power to extend forgiveness to others. * You have the right to feel sad, betrayed, angry, and resentful when you've been injured. Understand, accept and express your feelings. Pushing them below the surface only means they will erupt in another place, at another time. * Justice may right the wrongs, but forgiveness heals the hurt. Seek forgiveness beyond justice. * Sometimes people hurt you because, like you, they are learning and growing. Forgive their incompleteness, their humanness. * To refuse to forgive is to continue to hurt yourself. Victimized once, your lack of forgiveness keeps you stuck as a victim, holding on to a victim's identity. Instead, claim the identity of one who forgives. * No loving relationship is free of hurts. Bind up the wounds of love with forgiveness. * When you are having a difficult time forgiving, recall a moment when you wanted to be forgiven. Offer the other person what you wanted to receive. * Forgiveness takes practice. Start with small hurts and work your way up to the big ones. * Forgiveness may seem futile when you see no immediate results. But healing and growth are like fine aged cheese — not instant mashed potatoes. Give forgiveness time. * You cannot change someone for the better by holding a grudge. Grudges only change you–for the worse.   * When someone won't forgive you, refusing to forgive in return is no answer. That's like wrapping yourself in the other's chains. Keep yourself free; forgive. * To help you forgive, picture the other person surrounded by the light of God. See yourself stepping into that same light, and feel God's presence with you both. * Forgiveness is not something you do for someone else; it is something you do for yourself. Give yourself the gift of forgiveness. *Sometimes, when we have been wronged, bruised, angered or betrayed, it is difficult to forgive. It is easier said than done. But too much anger and resentment makes it hard for us to move on. All that pain we refuse to let go will bury us in a place we shouldn't get stuck in. After the hurt and anger should come healing, and healing can only take place if we allow ourselves to forgive.

We should pray that God gives us the grace to forgive. Ask HIM to give us a heart big enough to be humble. Once we choose to forgive, then and only then can we heal, then and only then can we free ourselves of the burden of our wounds.

Free yourself! Forgive. Allow God's love to thaw your heart!

33 facts about guys

Dunno how far this could be true…
 Believe it or not…….

1. Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat  and presentable girls.

2. Guys hate flirts.

Doesn't this all make sense?

superior…

There is nothing noble in being superior to someone else. 

The true nobility is in being superior to your previous self.

What is Rich and What is Poor

This is an old story but worth its weight in gold to serve as a reminder for life lessons learning.

One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live. They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.

On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, “How was the trip?” “It was great, Dad.” “Did you see how poor people live?” the father asked. “Oh yeah,” said the son. “So, tell me, what you learned from the trip?” asked the father. The son answered: “I saw that we have one dog and they had four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night. “Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon. We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight. “We have servants, who serve us, but they serve others. We buy our food, but they grow theirs. We have walls around our property to protect us; they have friends to protect them.” The boy’s father was speechless. Then his son added, “Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are.” A Chinese proverb says: “He who is content can never be ruined.” Some people complain all the time. “They’re not paying me enough…” “The benefits here are lousy…” “I never liked my job…” But wait till a chilling message begins to creep through the corporate grapevine. “There’s news that the company has been brought by another and there will be a massive layoff.” “Many jobs will be cut and many positions will be declared redundant…” Suddenly, the tune of the music changes drastically. Discontent turns into fear. Grumbling turns into prayers. And why do we have to allow things like these to happen? We never appreciate the value of something until that thing is taken away from us. And why is this so? Because it is so hard for us to learn and understand contentment.

Without contentment, there will always be contention.

Here is the key. Shoot for the best. Excel in whatever field you are in. Dream big dreams but learn to enjoy life’s small pleasures along the way. And when we are faithful in what  we do, skilled in the doing and excellent in the things done, the small pleasures turn into opportunities for bigger ones. Enjoy them all. Paul in the New Testament says: “I have learned to be content in whatever condition I am in.” Somebody says: “To live content with small means, to seek elegance rather than luxury, and refinement rather than fashion; to be worthy, not respectable, and wealthy, not rich; to study hard, think quietly, talk gently, act frankly; to listen to the stars and birds, to babes and sages, with open heart; to bear all cheerfully, do all bravely, await occasion, hurry never; in a word, to let spiritual, unbidden and unconscious, grow up through the common. This is to be my symphony.`

So is this your symphony as well?

let’s talk about… lost love…

Every love affair has it’s lifetime. Meaning if it has a beginning, it has an ending.  Some relationships last at the end of partners lifetime, some die soon after they started.

Love may start at the strongest passion but as time goes by and the storm of emotions calms down, relationships once so bright and full of surprises become routine. It drags on for a while and then comes crisis. A couple can either survive through it or fall apart.

Even when the love is gone it’s always hard to realize that you have to end something that was once so great. There’s no certain way to decrease the sad feelings about falling apart. You may only try to stay civilized about it and let the one who’s leaving you to do it without making up grandiose scandals and hysterics.

Although some think that it’s better to stay enemies than friends because then you will have nothing to regret about and won’t execute meaningless attempts to get things back. But is it so right to ruin all the memories about the happy time two people have spent together with ugly scenes screaming and blaming each other in the worst sins?

It’s over when it’s over and sometimes it’s obvious that all is over. Two people scream and shout one at the other almost everyday, they have nothing to talk about and if they do every conversation turns into a quarrel, one finds faults with everything the other does, they both simply annoy each other. That’s definitely the end.   

The question is where the love’s gone. Nobody knows it. Maybe they’ve been spending too much time together and finally have started to bore each other. Maybe he has stopped telling her about his love and she has stopped feeling it. Maybe time has made the illusions disappear and the reality has turned to be not what they both expected. Maybe there was only passion and after it’s gone nothing has left. There can be plenty of those maybes. Every misfortune has it’s own face. It may even be that nothing is over but people need to take a little rest one from the other or try to diversify their relationships. In fact when each one of a couple is willing to fight to make love stay they’ll find the way to do it.

people…

People won't remember what you did. People won't remember what you said. But, people will remember how you made them feel.

two roads???

Someone once asked me, "Why do u always insist on taking the hard road?".

the reason behind being unhappy…

The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be.

chicken sopas

for my bro.. try to cook this… 

INGREDIENTS

1/2 pound chicken breast
5 cups chicken stock
2 garlic cloves, chopped
1 small onion, chopped
2 tablepoons fish sauce
1 cup macaroni
1 carrot, cut into match-size pieces
1/2 cup milk
3/4 cups cabbage, shredded
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/8 teaspoon dark sesame oil
2 tablespoons oil

Put a 1/2 pound chicken breast and broth in a pan. Cover and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to a simmer and cook until the chicken is tender, about 30 minutes.

Remove the chicken and let cool. Discard the chicken skin and bones. Shred the chicken meat and set aside. Strain the broth and set aside. Clean the pan.

Heat the oil and sauté the onions and garlic, until the onion is soft. Return the chicken to the pan and stir-fry for 2 minutes. Add the chicken broth. Cover and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer 2 minutes.

Add the fish sauce to taste. Add the macaroni and simmer until tender. Cut carrot into matchstick-size pieces, and add to the pot along with the milk. Simmer until the carrots are crispy and tender. Add the cabbage. Cook for 1 minute more. Add the sesame oil and season to taste with salt and pepper.

Makes 6 servings

Afritadang Manok (Chicken Stew)

for my bro… try this recipe….

Ingredients

* 1 kilo chicken (cut into parts)
* ½ kilo potatoes (peeled and quartered)
* 1 small head of garlic (minced)
* 1 big onion (diced)
* 1 red bell pepper (quartered)
* 1 green bell pepper (quartered)
* 2 cups stock
* 1 cup tomato sauce
* ½ cup breadcrumbs
* Pinch of salt & pepper
* Oil

METHOD

1. In a casserole, brown chicken on both sides and set aside.
2. Sauté garlic and onion.
3. Pour in the stock and tomato sauce.
4. Bring to a boil and add in the chicken.
5. Allow simmering until chicken is cooked.
6. Add in potatoes and allow cooking.
7. Add in bell pepper and season with salt & pepper.
8. Add in breadcrumbs and thicken sauce.
9. Serve hot.

reality…

If you can't solve it, it isn't a problem - it's reality. And sometimes reality is the hardest thing to understand and the thing that takes the longest to realize. But once it hits you in the face you'll never forget it. It will always be there in your memories and sometimes that is the best way to look at it.

jump!!!

You cannot always wait for the perfect time,  sometimes you must dare to jump.

Tinolang Manok (Chicken Ginger Stew with Vegetables)

for my brother in singapore, try this…. 

Ingredients :

· 1 lb. chicken, cut into serving pieces
or any choice cuts of your liking like thighs, drumsticks or wings)
· 1 thumb-sized fresh ginger root, cut into strips
· 2 cloves garlic, crushed
· 1 onion, chopped
· 2 tbsp. patis (fish sauce)
· salt, to taste
· 4 to 5 cups water (or rice water – 2nd washing)
· 2 to 3 sayote (chayote squash), quartered (or green, unripe papaya or potatoes)
· 1 cup sili (chili) leaves or malunggay or substitute 1/2 lb. spinach · vegetable oil

Cooking Procedures :

1. In a medium saucepan, heat oil over medium heat. Sauté ginger and garlic until fragrant. Add onions, stir-fry until softened and translucent.

2. Add chicken cuts. Cook for 3 to 5 minutes until chicken colors slightly. Season with patis and salt.

3. Pour in water (or rice water, if using). Bring to a boil. Lower the heat and let it simmer until chicken is half-done. Add in chayote (or papaya or potatoes, if using). Continue simmering until chicken and vegetable are tender. Correct seasonings and then add sili leaves or malunggay or substitute. Stir to combine until well blended. Remove from heat.

4. Let stand for a few minutes to cook the green vegetables. Transfer to a serving dish and serve hot.